Never Change For Anyone.

I know it's been a while again. I think it definitely is true, once you've settled in a relationship and you're happy in love, blogging becomes less important. You don't need it in your life, it's a comforting friend who's there for you all the time when you want to complain and wallow in self pity because you want someone in your life who you can turn to, who will love you and listen to you and care. But they wouldn't even have to listen to you wallowing because they make you so happy that you don't need to complain about life anymore, because suddenly you're one of the lucky ones. Lucky in love, happy in love. Just like you always wished for. Just like I always wished for.

He loves me. He told me so. So I should be in the happiest girl in the world. I am, I guess. I know how lucky I am.

Today, a few hours ago, my Mom came into my bedroom when I was writing down on my calender everything I had planned for the next few months and hugged me. She said "you know you're nice don't you?"
(I know "nice" is a pretty lame adjective, but nice to us is important, it means being a good person, being selfless and committed to helping people, being the best person you can to everyone, including yourself.)
Well, I replied with a smile and "what makes you say that?" and she said "nothing, I just hoped you knew that you're a really nice person." I jokingly said "I know" and hugged her back, and she said "don't change, don't ever change for anyone."

Then she read a love quote that was on the month of July on my calender that says something like
"May you have walls for the wind, a roof for the rain, tea beside the fire, laughter to cheer you, those you love near you, and all that your heart may desire."
Then she left me to wonder. And then I thought about a blog to write. Not this one, but one that should hopefully be coming soon. I like writing. Hopefully I can improve with practise.

I wondered what had made her say that to me, it seemed obvious that her and my Dad had been talking about me, but what about and why? So I thought, "have I changed since I got into a relationship?" I know I've change since I got to university. I've become more confident, more willing to speak, to get involved, and I'm happier. I smile and talk to people and make an effort. Before, I was a young, (quiet in certain situations), well bought up girl who spoke when she thought she should and said what she though she should, but now I don't mind disagreeing and saying my opinion, even if it does oppose someone else's which is different. But I guess this confidence was bound to come out from somewhere eventually and I think its the more confident self I'm not to change. I also think, though, that I have definitely gained the majority of this confidence from the boy. I know it's because I've been at uni, but that is just where I happened to meet him, I think if I'd have met him here my confidence would have soared and it would have been more obvious that it was the boy. But let's keep that a secret and pretend it was university that did it!

I'm cynical about whether people change or not. I think situations change and people adapt to them, but do they actually ever change? I think you need something to click inside you, for something really significant to happen to make you realise something, and epiphany, before someone actually can change, and they have to decide and commit to changing. That leaves margin for error and that they could always fall back into their old self and old ways, but the only way you can change it if you choose to.

I choose to stay the same. Stay nice, and caring, and in love.

Don't stop, don't change, stay beautiful.
Never change for anyone. Be yourself. That's who everyone wants. Including you.

x